Christmas Time is not always a joyful time for me. It was always just a holiday to me with a lot of work, until I went through a time in my life where my sister left our house young and not on a good note, then my parents began to fight a lot, and my dad ended up leaving. Then even my first Christmas with just my mom and I, our house burnt down only a few days before. Don’t get me wrong, Christmas’ were still good, just seemed to be a lot harder to stay joyful. Fortunately, around this time in my life is when I came to know the Lord. Now I’m married to an amazing man who Loves Christmas!
This time of year is when I really recognize how selfish I truly am. My emotions begin flying and when one little thing goes wrong – I flip out! So needless to say, God has really been working on my heart these past few months.
I was feeling like I was working so hard and no one else was doing very much at all. I kept getting more and more upset. Everyone would ask more and more of me and it would just add to my anger. Sometime as small as my husband asking me to go grab a movie from upstairs, to my friends asking for me to do them favors to my church family asking me to do more ministry, and set ups, and this and that…. everything seemed like a huge weight!
I think we all do this. We look at our load and complain that we have to do so much. We could have the easiest load in the whole church and being as selfish as we are, we will want God, and everyone else around us to lighten it.
Well I cried out to God for weeks about this, and I kept saying, “God! Why do I need to do all of this!? Why can’t others pick up some slack? Why should I have to do this? I feel like a servant!” And we do sometimes, feel like slaves, do so much all the time. Or even only doing a little every once in a while. We think “Why should I have to do this or that for someone else? I only HAVE to look out for myself.”
After praying a few weeks about this, God spoke to me straight. “You are a servant, and you gave me permission to use you as one.” Oh how I wanted to scream back “Your servant God! Not everyone else’s!” Thats when it hit me.
‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ Matthew 25:39-4
Now on a regular basis, I have to continue to say to myself, whenever I am feeling overwhelmed, taken advantage of, or even just overworked – “I am a servant! And I will be the greatest servant I can for God”
It really does give so much more to yourself when you give to others. I hope you all enjoyed your Christmas and remember, everything you do – you do for the Lord!
Have a great New Years!